Saturday, February 7, 2009

Booby Trap!

Ladies and Gentlemen!

Mrs. Danvers and I took a our usual morning walk today, but I decided to go down an alley way to cut back to the house because I woke up a little "tired" and because I saw a discarded pizza box. I didn't find anything except crusts in the pizza box. But, look what I did find!

Mrs. Danvers doesn't like a collar. But I love a cuff.

Yes, that is Mrs. Danvers. And yes, that is a telephone pole. And yes, that is a pair of handcuffs bolted to it. At first I thought maybe it was some sort of "tool" left behind by the Verizon man.

But, then I remembered that I was in West Hollywood. I was very tempted to try on the opened cuff, but thought it might be a trap! What if I would put it on and someone would come take advantage of me?

Well, it didn't work. No one ever came by with a key, and Mrs. Danvers had to finally dial 9-1-1. Thank God she has one opposable thumb.

So after this horrific "accident" I have decided to create my own safety campaign, similar to the "If you throw away a refrigerator out onto the street, make sure you take the door off!"

My campaign will be more like "If you handcuff a friend to a telephone pole, make sure you close both cuffs before disposing of the body."

Don't worry about me,
VJ

3 Comments:

Blogger Tori said...

I'm sorry you were incapacitated for so long, but I'm happy that Mrs. Danvers saved the day.

She could not be any more adorable! Did you keep the cuffs?

February 7, 2009 at 4:13 PM  
Blogger Geoff said...

ROFL. (Thank god Mrs Danvers has one opposable thumb!)

February 7, 2009 at 6:04 PM  
Blogger Varla Jean Merman said...

I didn't keep them! Tried to, but they were bolted to the pole!

February 9, 2009 at 9:52 AM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home